things to remember: a blog in pictures, day 1

life getting the way of life

You ever find that happening to you? You know, when life gets in the way of life? I know that sounds redundant but think about it. The life you have gets in the way of the life you want. It happens. We focus so much on life here on Earth that we forget about the life God wants us to lead. Day to day life takes over and the Life being led for God gets pushed on the back burner.

Recently I have found myself questioning my addiction to the internet. I know, and here I am writing a blog! lol Kinda  funny. Anyhow, I have been questioning whether it is profitable for me to be here online as much as I am. It's not, there is no question about it. It is not the life I imagined me having. It is not the life I had hoped to have. It is not the life God wants me to have.

 

So what am I going to do about it? I plan to take action. I have to make life changes. I hate making life changes by the way. I know I have to, I just haven't decided what those changes will exactly be though. Cutting out the surfing is one of them though.

I know that the internet will take a back seat for a while. I can check it in the late afternoon or evenings. I have things on the compute that has to get done but I have to limit my internet though.  I must read the Scriptures more often, that is unmistakeably, unequivocally, undeniably the most important task needing to keep focused on. I have to go through my digital pictures. I have to work on completing the boy's' schooling this year and plan for next year. I have some organizing to do at home here too. I have a lot to do.

I can no longer let life get in the way of the life I need to be living. Can you? Are you? I was, but now I won't be. Will you?

how much can we handle?

Ok, so God thinks I can handle quite a lot apparently. I don't want Him to think that. I want Him to stop giving me so much to handle. I really do.

Over the past 3 months or so we have had one problem after another rise up to need our attention. Between my mom's passing, major car issues, health scares, Mike's now probably permanent 80% vision loss and our van pretty much  dieing I'm not so sure I can handle it all. I know I don't want to handle it all.

I am trying to rely on God, I really am. I pray, I read, I pray some more. I can't help feeling that I have failing those around me and especially my husband. I'm not being the wife I should be and I know I'm not being the mother I should be.

I ask others for encouragement and some help fine tuning my life, trying to get my life under some sort of control but no one seems to care. No one seems to want to help. What do I do?

O, enough crying, enough woe is me crap! I am done. I have to get up and move on, right? pull up my boots straps as the saying goes. What has God told me about life?

Simple, rejoice in it for He has given us breath in our lungs. There are so many others out there without and we are blessed with. There are hurting people, disfigured people, people on a ventilator for their whole life, there are others with dementia that don't even know how they are. Yes I sit here complaining and crying over a few bumps in the road.
My husband can still work, he can still see out of one eye, he can breath, play and laugh. I can walk, I can clean, I can breath on my own. My kids can talk, learn, play and watch tv, invite their friends over and so much more. We are truly blessed beyond measure.

So what is going on in your lives that you are grumbling about today? Are things not going your way? Are things hard to deal with? Are you breathing? Walking? Thinking? Can you work? Pay your bills? Plan your life? Some people can't. Some people can't get out of bed, wipe their own butt, breath on their own. They are the ones that truly should get our empathy.

(Note: I did not say sympathy, I said empathy. Empathy is way different then sympathy, btw. One is understanding another s feelings, the other is feeling those feelings with them.)

What right do I have, do you have, to sulk in our own problems when others out there are so less fortunate then we are? Even if we do not know o anyone, personally, that has things worse then we do, they are out there. Trust me. In a house near you there is a woman getting beaten, there are children left unattended because their parent feels the need to go get drugs, there is an elderly woman or man who is neglected and left in their 0own filth. Trust me, these people are out there, whether we admit it or not. So when you feel like sulking in your own problems remember that those problems really aren't as bad as we let ourselves think.

Pull up your boot straps, dust yourself off and cling to the Lord. Only He can help you feel better. Only He can give you peace and comfort. Only He loves you enough to die specifically for you.

PS: This blog is more so written for me then it is for you. Therapy is just one person talking to another. I am talking to you and you, by listening, are my therapist here on Earth. God is my true therapist though. He helps me through all life's little (and not so little) problems.

Thank you.

thing is

thing is so many things are on my mind.

I'm gonna be 40 this year, in Nov. I'm lost my real mom, my real dad, my foster mom, my grandfather-in-law, and my father-in-law already. I never knew my grandparents in my real home nor my foster home. I barely knew my aunts and uncles in those homes either. I would like to say I am too young to have all this death upon me, but I'm not I'm afraid.

Years ago, I was deeply hurt by someone. That person had no idea they hurt me, let alone hurt me so deeply. I'm sure if they did they would have been horrified as it was not their nature, nor their intent. But I was hurt nonetheless.

Being a foster kid you grow up not really knowing where you fit in in life. Yes, I was blessed beyond measure to have the foster family I did have. I was raised, lovingly, by the same couple for 14 years. It was a Christian household. I was blessed. VERY BLESSED.

Growing up in a foster family, despite it being a wonderful home, I always felt like I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. My real mom gave me up, willingly. My real dad did not stop her. I was torn from my siblings, left not seeing them hardly at all.When other foster kids in this home moved out most contact was lost. I was never sure why or who's fault it was. I was feeling that maybe that would happen to me when I moved out. Again, I was waiting for the shoe to drop. I was waiting, half expecting, life to get worse.

Despite all that I had and all that I was given, deep inside me I was hurting. I guess I still am. When someone whom you love deeply tells you something so hurtful, even if it is due to a deteriorating medically issue, it is very, very hurtful.

I'm sorry I lost so many years over something so stupid. Had I just known. Had someone told me her condition,. I can't go back, I must go forward. My life is not here for others to determine my worth. God has done that already. Only he can determine my worth and He did so upon that cross. I just pray that others can see that too.

I was a brat growing up. I was a bit self-righteous, very pig-headed, and maybe snobby. I was hurt by so many people that I wasn't sure what it was like not to feel hurt. Maybe that is why I was always expecting to have the other shoe drop and my life to be turned upside down again. Maybe that is why I believed the hurtful words. Maybe means nothing in the long run though.

I'm an adult now. I'm different then that stupid lil kid and arrogant teenager. I have learned a lot since those years so long ago. I have been hurt deeply and have been able to get over it. I have been treated rudely and been able to get past it. God has healed me from a lot of hurt. He has physically healed my body from the abuse and healed my mind from the memories. He has healed my soul by showing how much He cares for me. But, just like when I was a kid, I get hurt still. God has my hand in His right now for I have no other place to put it. He is guiding me as to what to do and what to think. He is holding His hand over my mouth keeping me from saying things I'll regret. He is whispering for me to be calm.

Right now I'm hurt by three people. I need to let that hurt melt away. I know my intentions. I think I know their intentions. I know what I am doing and I know how I should behave. Giving it to God is my only choice really. Why do I hold on to it though? Because I am human.

~~ God, you know my hurt. You know my thoughts and my feelings. I chose not to give into those feelings. I chose to give them to you instead. Heal me Lord. Heal my hurt, my anger, my frustrations.  ~~

I lost all those years with my mom but I know she has forgiven me as that is they type of person she was. She was lovely in so many ways.

Mom, you are truly missed by so many people down here on Earth. You are loved and cherished and held tightly in our hearts. I love you. I'm glad you never gave up on me and always loved me despite how things turned out.

Dance the night away and play that organ music for the angels. While you're there, mom, give Jesus a hug for me. <3 rip

correction on my forgiveness post

Since I wrote the first forgiveness blog the other day I have had a few conversations with people. I have thought a lot about what I wrote and how it came across. I forgot to add something, the absolutely most important thing was left out. I was tired and I was stupid, that is my reason for forgetting...


SALVATION

You see salvation is the most important thing to forgiveness.., We could wish forgiveness on everyone and we could convince ourselves that we have truly forgiving someone but unless that hurt and pain has somewhere to go, it's still in you. It doesn't just disappear. I know,. I've been there.

You see when I was a lil tyke I was severely abused, emotionally, yes. Physically, yes. sexually, yup you guessed it, that too.

How does one forgive their parents when instead of protecting them they are causing the abuse. How does a young girl forgive the father that raped her? I'm telling you she can't. I couldn't. My dad died denying all that happened. How could he?

What was a girl to do when her mother denied all of it too? Her own mother broke her bones in a fit of anger... her mother, her very own biological mother, caused scar tissue on her brain from all the beatings...

How could that little girl forgive that? She can't...

But God can. You see God is bigger then the hurt. Bigger then the pain. Bigger then the abuse. Jesus took all the pain, all the anger, all the hurt, all the hate upon Himself on the cross. He had His arms spread out, nailed to the cross and then dripping with blood He cried out Forgive them Father for the y know not what they do. That is true forgiveness. You can't have true forgiveness with the out that....

So you see Salvation is the key to true forgiveness...

enough said.

update on forgiveness

Hi. well, it''s been 2 days since I wrote that last long post. You know the one about forgiveness? Well, I was thinking yesterday that it might have been a temporary thing that I was feeling. I'm here to say that once God fixes something, it doesn't break again until we mess with it. lol If I leave my hands out of God's handiwork things will be a ok. lol

I'm still feeling pretty well about the lady I was so hurt by.

Writing this right now makes me think of something.

I was hurt by this lady right? Well, I know she didn't mean to intentionally hurt me. I can't see her thinking that way. So, the only other way to understand what happened was a bit of miscommunication and lack of listening to each other.

That leads me to think about whose fault my feelings getting hurt was. After thinking about it, only one explanation makes sense. It was my fault my feelings got hurt. How cold that be? I wasn't rude, I wasn't hurtful to this person. I was trying to avoid the argument. How could it truly be my fault?

Well, we all have choices in life. We can choose one thing or the other. Forgiveness is a choice. Hatred is a choice, love is a choice. They are all action words. I could have chose not to get so hurt my her words. I could have just been like a duck and let it roll off my back.

I must remember this for when (and I do men when as I am still human and will continue to screw things up) I open my mouth and get myself into trouble again.

So anyhow, leave it in God's hands is truly the best advice ever!

Praise God.

true forgiveness, finally.

Forgiveness.

It's not about them, it's about you.

I have been dealing with an issue that has been preventing me from giving true forgiveness.

I won't say who or what but lets say I was deeply hurt by someone. I sort of wanted to forgive as I know that is the right thing to do, but deep down inside I did not really want to forgive this lady. My feelings were to deeply hurt. I was angry and a bit bitter.

One would think that to forgive someone is to forget what they did and to be best friends with them again. Not so. It truly has nothing to do with the person you are forgiving. It has to do only with ourselves.

Think about it this way. If you are angry at someone, who does that affect? You. Most likely that person doesn't know you are angry or doesn't care. If you are hurt by and bitter towards someone who does that affect? You. Not them. They probably don't know or don't realize the extent of your hurt feelings. If they did they might or might not care. They might or might not do anything to help you feel better about the situation. They have no control over your feelings. They have no say over how you feel. Only you do. You can't make them apologize but you can chose to forgive. It truly is a choice. A decision you have to make; to forgive or not to forgive is the question of the day.


I have had to make the decision today. God has been working on me for sometime now to make this decision but stupid me doesn't like to listen. Listen means that I may be wrong and I did not want to admit I was wrong. But I was wrong. I was wrong for not wanting to forgive this lady.


Let me simply say one thing before I go on. Forgiveness does not mean you have to put yourself in the same situation to get hurt again. It does mean that even though you know what happened and you knwo how you were hurt you must not let it bother you anymore. Our human brains do not forget like God does. We tend to remember every horrible detail of how wer were hurt, by whom, when and how badly. We need to make a conscience decision to put it in the past and leave it there.


Ok, back to what I was saying. I had a good friend call today and tell me he was praying for us with this situation. In fact he prayed right there on the phone with me. He gave me some great advice about this topic. Then, immediately (within seconds) another close friend called me. We talked for 90 minutes (WOW!!!!!) and she gave me some great advice too. (Can you say God was working on my heart today???)


To err is human to forgive is divine. My good friend said this to me today. She said how true it is. True forgiveness only comes from a divine being giving us grace to do so. We cannot forgive on our own. We must have the grace of God to be able to truly forgive.


Without going into any more details I just wish to simply say that I praise God for giving me the grace needed to truly forgive the woman who so deeply hurt me.


I do wish to add more to this post but it is late and I am am tried. I have to go to bed. Maybe I might add more in a day or two. We'll see.


For now I will leave you with this.


Luke 17:2-4  It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him.



Matthew 18:21-22  Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.


Matthew 6:14-15  For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

For all the moms out there.... and dads too!

31 Things To Do on a Boring, Rainy or Cold day...

Ok, before I go into my post I want to share another blogger's post.

http://www.thriftyhomemaker.com/2010/01/31-winter-activities-for-kids.html

1. Make a cake/ cupcakes and use powdered sugar for icing and drizzle over a paper snowflake.
2. Write a poem or story about snow or winter
3. Hide a mitten in the room somewhere and let others try to find it. Give them clues by telling them whether they are 'hot' (near the mitten) or 'cold' (far from the mitten).
4. Go for a walk and look for animal tracks in snow
5. Make ice cube popsicles by freezing juice and putting a toothpick in to hold it with
6. Make snowmen out of old socks
7. Watch birds
8. Make a list of things to do in 2011
9. Draw a winter picture
10. Clean toys, books and clothes to bless others with
11. Eat popcorn and play a game
12. Make cinnamon toast in the oven
13. Make glitter snowflakes, draw on paper with glue shake glitter or salt let dry and write Psalm 51:7
14. Make ice sun catchers using pie plates and nature items, add water and string to freeze and hang up.
15. Make pizza and watch a movie
16. Make snowflakes with tortillas
17. Bake Cookies
18. Make Marshmallow snowmen
19. Make Rice Socks
20. Make Snowflake Tshirts
21. Have Picnic inside
22. Make igloo with marshmallows/sugar cubes and icing
23. Play with snow in a tub / pan / tub in the house.
24. New Years Poppers to give to others
25. Make Snow Cream if it snows or make glue snowflakes
26. New Years Day Dinner
27. Play in Snow if no snow make white play dough
28. Read snow and winter books
29. Make Paper Snow Flakes
30. Pinecone Bird Feeders
31. Make Donuts out of can biscuits

Now my post.
I love all these ideas but some aren't ones I would do even if my kids were still little. I thought what a cool idea to make a list like this though. So here I am, making my own version of the 31 things to do on a boring, rainy or cold day...

31 Things To Do on a Boring, Rainy or Cold day... 


1) using construction paper make a hopscotch board on your floor. Use bean bags, larger coins, small soft toys or such to instead of rocks.

2) Take silly pictures of each other with a digital camera.

3) Put on a fashion show.


4) make a tent out of blankets and have story time in the tent. (String up strings and drape the blankets over them to hang them as the sides of the tent or throw a blanket over the kitchen table covering all the sides and camp under the table.) :o) 

5) Make sun catchers with coffee filters, markers and spray bottles of water. color with markers, spray with water then let dry. :o)

6) make up a game to play. 


7) tell stories


8) do some kitchen science.


9) play with a light up bouncy ball or flashlights in a dark room.


10) create a spa in your house complete with a nail polishing center, a facial area and a hair dressing table.


11) play floor hockey in the basement or on carpet. You could use bouncy balls instead of hard balls.


12) Make your own phone using cans and string. Go into separate rooms and talk to each other. :o)


13) build with Legos. You could make all sorts of things from complete cities to futuristic cars!


14) Play house. Play dolls.


15) Create your own restaurant. Make a menu, decorate the table top and then serve food suing the fancy dishes.


16) think of what era you would have liked to be born in and then dress up and spend the day like you actually lived in that era.

17) go for an expedition in your own house. Plan a route, and events to do at each destination (ie: room)

18) start a scavenger hunt

19) make up silly songs

20) play the music really loud and dance the day away.

21) bake cookies

22) make a rainy day scrapbook. (Scrapbook about only the things you would do on a rainy day)

23) act out different animals

24) play with water. use food coloring, toys rocks etc.... have fun with it.

25) Have a pajama day. Bring the blankets and pillows out int the living room, cuddle up and watch a movie together.

26) go outside in the rain and dance and play in it. Stomp in all those puddles!

27) have a fear factor day. Do things you usually wouldn't like to do just to see if you can do them. Make sure there are prizes for all that hard work of doing things you don't like!!!!

28) create an obstacle course through your house and time yourself as you race thru it.

29) Tie Dye t-shirts or pajamas. You could also do pillowcases too. :o)

30) using window markers decorate your windows for all the world to see.

31) Play Marco Polo, sharks and minnows, or other such games, in a spacious open area lke the living =room or basement.

Ok, so there is the not 31 things I could think of. I hope I have not repeated any. lol If you like this and wish to share it by all means do so. If you try any of these ideas and like them comment below.

Oh, here are a couple of more ideas.

Play jepordy (make up your own questions and such.)
play wheel of fortune (again, make it up as you play)
act out your favorite tv show or book
Make your own ice cream or ice cream sandwiches


Ok, that is it for now. lol I think
Have a great night!!

sharing some great sites and blogs. Enjoy!

I have had a bit of free time, and thanks to some amazing friends, now have access to wifi high speed internet on my desktop. (The desktop being the primary computer I actually use, lol) I have had the opportunity to be able to search blogs and some fun and informative sites lately. I just wanted to share a few of my favorites. :o) I hope you enjoy them as much as I have.

24 CLEVER IDEAS TO MAKE LIFE EASIER

    http://jugglingwithchainsaws.com/2011/12/30/24-clever-ideas-to-make-life-easier/

Just from my own experience I have found a few things that have helped me in my everyday life.

I like to freeze chicken broth in ice cube trays so that I can add them to rice or noodles to add flavor.

We save the plastic trays from chocolate covered cherries. They make a great mold for homemade pb cups or nut clusters!

We use plain white stickers to bind our cables and cords. This keeps them tidy and gives us a place to label the cords so we know what ones go to what.

To organize toys I bought the plastic drawer units. We labeled the front of each drawer using printable stickers. We also use stackable crates to store games and large toys on. Placing the units in the closets gives us free space in our room and hides them from company. It also keeps the toys easily accessible and neat. The boys have quite a few nerf guns and blow pipes. I bought a clothing hamper and stand them up in that. It makes it easier for the boys to chose what they want to play with and keeps them from falling all over the place.

In the fridge we tend to have pop bottles and water bottles all the time. They tend to easily tip over. I put a tray in the fridge and place them on that. This keeps them from tipping over. (We have the wire grates as shelves in our fridge.)

To keep the Tupperware cupboard neat I only buy stackable containers. I then put all the lids in a plastic clear shoebox (you can buy one at the dollar store). This makes the lids easily found and at your fingertips when needed.

I’m sure there are many other things we do around our place but I will not bore you anymore.

So You’re Thinking About Giving Up Your Pet? You Might Want to Reconsider.

    http://makeadifferencerescue.wordpress.com/2011/04/13/so-youre-thinking-about-giving-up-your-pet-you-might-want-to-reconsider/

 

Everyone I know knows that I am not a big animal person. That being said, even though I am not really fond of them I don't hate them either. I think killing an animal unnecessarily is uncalled for and should be avoided. They are one of God's amazing creatures. They deserve to live. I just think that people who took the time to pick out an animal, buy it food and bedding, and have taken them to the vet to make sure they are healthy have made an unspoken commitment to taking care of that animal. That animal is now dependent on you. You have made it so. Stand up and make sure you take care of that animal then. It's not the animals fault you change life situations. If you find you cannot keep the animal for certain reasons, find it a new home. NOT A SHELTER. Most certainly DO NOT just let it roam free. This animal you are trying to “set free” has been dependent on humans to care for it. It is not used to the world and will surely be eaten or starved all just because you changed your mind. Don’t do that to the animal. It’s cruel. Ok, off my soap box for now. Thanks for listening. :o)

Being Retarded

http://phoebeholmes.com/2011/12/23/being-retarded/

 

I have an older brother who is clinically diagnosed as Mentally Retarded. I do not honestly believe he is retarded but rather  somewhere along the autism spectrum. That being said, I feel that those who are retarded are due more respect then we give them. They are smart, wonderful people who have such a warm heart, and a bright smile. They certainly are a true gift from God.  They are innocent for the most part. They have not grown up to become the way society feels they should be. They are who they are, not who others think they should be.

I sometimes am very guilty of using the word “retarded” casually and off-handedly towards others that I am close to but I never do it in anger or frustration, nor do I do it to those I do not know. I usually use it as a joke and a playful put down (usually referring to myself). May I first say I am sorry to those who are offended by my attitude. I do feel that I am wrong for using that word so casually but I also think too many people put more meaning on the word itself and get offended way too easily. My son has Asperger’s Syndrome. So does my hubby. My other son has Moebius Syndrome. My brother has Mental Retardation and I have other siblings that are “slow”. My parents were both “slow”. I have grown up around people with disabilities all my life. I babysat a child with Downs Syndrome for most of my high school years. She was a pure delight. I am not without sympathy or empathy just because I use the words in ways you may not like. If I see that I have offended anyone I will willingly apologize and correct me attitude. Please do not take offense to it as it is not said with maliciousness or to berate anyone. It is not said with uncaring or being flippant. It is just said.

Ok, this is my FAVORITE site that I have come across recently. 

http://playathomemom3.blogspot.com/

She also has a facebook page located here:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Play-at-Home-Mom/174614952594331

 

Now, some of these ideas I have seen, and used, before. Some of them are absolutely wonderful! I really wish I had this site when my children were younger. It would have made their difficulties that much easier to deal with and would have made homeschooling so much more fun. I have spent so much time (that could probably have been spent doing something more useful, lol) looking at this site.

Ok, well, that is it for now. I hope you find these sites helpful and fun to look at. I know I did. :o)

WOW! So many amazing things to talk about tonight. Right now, due to wanting to get to bed soon I will only talk about two things.

First thing I must praise the Lord Almighty for helping guide me to something that is actually helping me out of this depression rut I was in. For the last month or a bit more I have been taking St. John's Wort. I must tell you, IT IS AMAZING STUFF!!!

I'm not sure what it does in the body but I do know that it has changed my life. I have not felt emotionally better in the last 10 so years. I feel more like myself and am interested in doing things I haven't found energy or desire to do in so long.... I am back into braiding my hair and painting my nails. I feel more like visiting with friends and talking to people. I feel more social. I feel physically better, not so tired, not so sore. I also know that now I am spiritually I am better. The desire to pray, read Scriptures and memorize the Word has increased a lot! all because of taking one pill!!! That is it! Ok, so it's really 4 pills but it is the same pill so I can honestly say it is one (type of) pill. lol I take two in the am and two in the pm. I am no longer on ANY depression meds. Yup, you read that right, NO DEPRESSION meds at all!!!! I am literally blown away by the difference in me. :o)

THANK YOU JESUS!

On the next note I want to thank Mathew Gerwitz for his continued wonderful performances as worship leader for Worship Jam night. Tonight's worship Jam was wonderful!! If you live in the Rochester area I HIGHLY recommend you come some day. You will be blessed!  Each and every month the Lord works on someone, if not everyone who joins us there. today it was me He was working on. I'm not sure about anyone else but I know I have an issue with pride. Yup, PRIDE.
When I was teaching Sunday school to the little ones we had a lesson on Jonah's pride getting in the way of him forgiving the Ninevites. I was trying to find a way to teach what pride is really all about. God showed me this acronym. Personal Reflection Is Deemed Excepterional. Well, all day I have been reminded of that acronym. During my driving around I was listening to the radio. I heard "My Own Little World" by Mathew West. I have recently been faced with seeing myself as the person this song is talking about. I tend to shut out the bad in the world because it is hard to deal with. It is hard to think that people will do horrible things to other people, even though I have been the "victim" of such horribleness. I find the daily news broadcasts depressing and even angring at times. I have said I no longer wath it because it is depressing. Well, truth be told, I hate seeing all the sin this world is doing. Hiding from it is not making it go away or stopping it in any stretch of hte imagination. It is only hindering me from learning the lessons God wants me to learn. I do not live in a world of only me. I live in the world as God made it, even thought we do not treat it is as so. I need to watch the news more often so I can pray for the country, the leanders and the other countries and their leaders. 

We tend to try to live in our own little worlds and as a result we forget that those out there in the world around us need our prayers and our help. We can only do that if we pay attention and care. 

I will leave you with a note of encouragement. Pray for those around and you and thank Jesus for the ability to do so. He uses each one of us where ever we are in life, whether we realize it or not. Wake up and start focusing on what can you do for Him? What can you do to further the cause of spreading His word and shining Hi light? I plan to try to be better at letting Him use me to the fullest. I pray you do also.

depression sucks rocks!

Supplements - hokum, right? vitamins - just a way for companies to make money on the niavity of the citizens. With all my medical issues taking vitamins and supplements won't help me much. I need to take prescriptions, right? Going off my meds is scary. How will I think and behave? I will become a basket case. I guess I am at the mercy of the doctors and pharmaceutical companies. UGH!!!!! Life is hard enough with out all these thoughts running through my head.

Ok, so where am I going with all this? Well, let me start from the beginning.  About 15 years ago I started having pains that were eventually found to be endometriosis. After 5 years of arguing with the insurance company I had  full hysterectomy. I thought that would be start of a pain free life. Little did I know then that it was only the start of a very, very long depressing road. After the surgery, I was diagnosed with a thyroid problem and depression along with being forced (due to the surgery) into menopause. All at the early age of 30. It was as if someone took my life and tossed it out the window. I was pain free for the most part but my whole personality changed. I was no longer the carefree loving life type of person. I hated what I had become. I tried to do the same things and live my life as "normal" as I could but I didn't have the heart for it anymore.

I have tried medicine after medicine. they have had one bad side effect after another, some of them particularly bad and uncontrollable. The meds were making me feel emotionally better, not great, just better. They were also controlling my life, ruining it day by day. I have two kids whom I homeschooled for many years before putting them into public school. (I eventually pulled them both out and am now homeschooling them again.) I couldn't take care of them they way I wanted to, the way I felt God wanted me to. I just didn't have the heart for life, being a mom, being a wife. Most days people had no idea how bad I felt because I tried to hide it but those who knew me best knew I was different.

I also have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome which causes a great deal of pain and tiredness. Along with the depression life pretty much sucked a lot. Now, don't think I was so bad that I wished to end my life. Praise the Lord that it never actually came to that. Even though I was depressed I was not suicidal thankfully!

Ok, so why am I telling you all of this??? It seems pretty dumb to tell my life story to those I do not really know. Why am I putting my medical issues on line for you to read? Is it becuase I want your sympathies? Oh heavens NO!!! I do not want your pity nor am I seeking attention. I am just simply sharing some amazing things with you that have happened to my lately.

Well, frankly that is the way life USED to be until a couple of days ago. I say used to be like becauase as of the last 4 or so days I have a new outlook on life and an whole new way of thinking and feeling. Praise the Lord!!! He is AMAZING!!!

St John's Wort is my new best friend! lol Ok, not my best friend but pretty close to it!

I started on a new medicine a while back that gave me some nasty shaking all day long! It drove me nuts. On top of that the doctor in all her college smartness thought that increasing the dose would actually help calm the shaking and make me feel better. Well, that didn't happen! lol (I actually love my doctor, she's really cool.)
I was really sick of all the side effects I would get taking all these stupid medications the doctors were prescribing to me. I had to do something!

Mike, my wonderfully, amazing husband, (and other people I know) have been talking to me over the years about trying vitamins. I have tried some but with a lot of skepticism. This time I thought I would try it again. Mike has been asking me to try St. John's Wort. So after all the shaking I have been doing I gave it a try. Not thinking anything would work I thought I was at the mercy of the medications; like it or not. What could it hurt to at least try the supplement? I had nothing to loose except the shaking, right I was getting desperate. I had to stop shaking! It was interfering with my daily life. So, I tried the suplement.

WOW!!!!! It works amazingly well!!!! I have read research on it and everything I see says that it takes up to 6 or so weeks for St. John's Wort to take full effect, though in just 2 days I felt so much better!!!!!! ONLY 2 DAYS!!!

It has been 3 or 4 days now and I have not taken any of my prescription medicines. I am not taking my depression med, my thyroid med nor my estrogen for menopause but I am not having any effects that would seem to happen if I miss a dose of my medicine. (I always get the withdrawal feelings if I miss a dose or two.)
I have not felt this great in so long. Over the last 10 or so years I have had a lot of trial and error with medications and supplements alike. I have NEVER had such a wonderful response to any of these until now.

I am not so naive that I might start to think that this little pill is the answer to all my depression problems. I am not holding onto the medication as a safety met or a cure all for my issues. I am smart enough to know that God is more powerful then anything we can imagine!!!! I am relying on God to help me through all of these though. God is bigger then any medicine man can come up with or find. God can and does use things to wake us up and help us through our issues. We have to have faith in Him to do so. He will if we seek Him and just ask. I am proof of that.

So, in all your tough moments in life remember that God is bigger then any of them and rely on Him. He is always there for you just waiting for you to seek Him and lean on Him. Sometimes He uses the little things here on Earth to help us out in our time of need.

As I told a friend at church this morning I am feel like I am waiting for the shoe to drop and to start feeling depressed again. She told me in all her wonderful joyfulness that the shoe won't drop because God is holding it so it won't. lol

I may become depressed again and if I do that is ok. I will deal with it when that happens. If it doesn't and I pray it won't, I know God will always be there for me to lean on. I know God deserves all the glory for how I feel. Praise His Holy Name! 

so life hands us more lessons

Ok, I find this really funny in an ironic sort of way. God certainly does have a way of using things in our lives to teach us things and also using things to remind us of His love.
After I wrote the post yesterday I went to church this morning. The service was amazing as usual, but it seemed familiar to me after writing last night's post. Today's teaching was about the second half of Romans 8. Matt, our pastor, used this part of Scriptures to remind us that in order for God to work in our lives we have to do a few things ourselves. First we need to ask Him for guidance. Second;y, we need to look for open doors and opportunities that He has provided for us. Matt's example was if you are looking for a job and putting in applications then Wendy's calls you TAKE THE JOB! Yes it may not be the highest paying job out there. It may not even cover all your bills and provide for your family however, it is income while you continue to search out better employment. By not taking the job offer you are closing the window that God has opened up for you. This made me think of my comment last night in my post that God has given me opportunities to make me feel better. He has kept me busy with little things that have been distracting me from being depressed.

All Pastor Matt's teachings are on line and downloadable from the church's website. 

I hope that any and all the online teachings at www.1wayjesus.org are helpful to you. I know they are to me.

I'll write more soon if I can. :o) Until then God Bless!!!

wow it's been ages

Hi people! Ok, so it really has been ages since I have blogged. tonight I'm not really up to it but I feel like I should, so here I am.
Things lately have been sort of strange on my end. Even though I may seem fine, physically, I am most assuredly not fine emotionally. Most every one who knows me knows I have depression due to a chemical imbalance. It is not fun, nor easy to deal with. I have had to switch medications numerous times because I am sensitive to the side effects or the meds just don't work for me. You can just imagine how frustrating this can be for me and my doctors. lol I guess the most frustrating part of all this is tryint to trust in the Lord.

Some days it is easy to trust Him. Some days I seem to have an overabundance amount of trust for my Saviour. Other days I wonder how things will get better and what I did to deserve having this issue. Some days I hate my life and I hate being depressed and I hate God for allowing me to become depressed. But no matter what kind of day I find myself having I know that God, the Creator of the universe, loves me enough to die for my sins so that I can spend eternity with Him. Now that is an enormous amount of love. Even on my worst days that alone helps pull me through.

I don't mention any of this to get people to pity me or feel bad for me. I mention it to get people a reality check. Life is hard but God is there for each one of us no matter if we ask Him to be or not.

Life with depression is not easy. It makes it difficult to be a wife, to be a mom, to be a homeschooling teacher, to be of use to the Lord. When I was little I watched my mom go through stages of depression and manic episodes. She was in the hospital quite a lot. I remember visiting her in the hospital while she was under psychiatric care. They, the docs, diagnosed her as a manic-depressive, today that is referred to as being bi-polar. Let me tell you, it's not easy to live with. One moment she was in the best mood, the next she was beating the daylights out of us, her children - literally beating us. She could be laughing and playing with us in the morning and by lunch time she would be full of anger and hate. She cried a lot at night. I never really knew why. Now I do. For some reason, maybe because she didn't take her meds the way she was supposed to - I don't know, her moods never seemed to stabilize until all her kids were in foster care. Even then her moods didn't stay normal. She suffered quite a lot while she was alive. I regret how things were with my mother while I was a kid. Maybe being able to go through some of what she went through with depression was the only way I would understand and sympathize with her. I don't know. Whatever reason I have depression now & the fact is it is not going away by itself. It's here. I have to deal with it.

I guess you might be wondering why I am writing this? Well, for a very particular reason. (Which is more for me then for you actually. lol) Life is hard for everyone. Not only me. Not only you. It is not going to get better by sitting on our tush and doing nothing about it. One cannot wish things better without actually doing something to improve their situation. Like tonight, I am depressed, I have been all day. I have been for days now. I have fought tears all day. But what do I do? I refuse to sit around and cry. I was able to be blessed by a wonderful friend who came over today and colored my hair for me. I was able to see another friend who stopped by also. Having people around, even though I did not feel like actually have anyone here, helped me feel better. Tonight, instead of crying I got out my hair accessories and braided my hair. Doing so made me feel better about myself and brightened up my spirits. Even though it did not take away the depression it did make it easier to deal with.

So you see, life is hard, but you don't have to sit around and let it be. Prayer is always the answer!!! I have prayed all day that I would feel better. I have prayed all day that God would help me through the day. God has given me the desire to do something about my situation and not sit around moping. Do I still feel depressed? Yes. Do I still want to cry for no reason? Yes. Am I crying? No. Why? What will that help? It won't. Now I'm not saying that if I cried that would be a bad things either. If I cried that would be ok but it's not helping me feel any better, now is it? No. God has given me a huge desire not to sit idly by and watch my life pass me. God has given me a huge desire to be happy even when the chemicals in my body make the very difficult to do so. When life seems to be falling around me and life seems to be bringing me down, the only place to look is up. Looking up brings me to look at my Saviour. If He could have endured what He did here on Earth, the beatings, the ridicule the mocking, having His Father - part of himself - look away from him, then I can deal with a little sadness.

On your worst days try to remember that others out there are worse off then you. Try to to remember that you can always chose how to proceed with your life. Will you chose to sit and wallow in self pity? Will you allow your feelings to control your life? I personally refuse to do that. I pray you do also. Only God has been my strength and I know from experience that ONLY God can ever be my strength. I have leaned on others and other things before to help me through my difficult times. All have failed to help but God has never failed, nor will He ever fail. So, on you worst days, lean on Him for He will hold you up.

Whatever you do, please do not feel sorry for me having depression. It is what it is. Let's move on. I'm trying to.  :o)

this has been an amazing week...

Despite being sick right now I am praising God's Holy Name. He is amazing, comforting, reassuring, loving, caring, forgiving, unchangeable, unstoppable, and He loves me enough to still save my soul so I can spend eternity with Him! I don't know if you understand the depth of His love, I know I don't despite being a Christian for many years.

an offensive picture posted on facebook.... please read....

Today's blog is in regards to a picture or a sign that someone posted on their page on facebook. another friend asked me what i thought about it. Here is my response. I hope you like it too!

Not to offend people but to give you a clearer picture as to why I wrote what I did.

The picture that was posted said:

"Religion is like a penis. 

It's fine if you have one.
It's fine to be proud of it.
But please don't whip it out in pub;lic and start waving it around.
And PLEASE don't try to shove it down my children's throats."



First I immediately removed it from my page as I was not impressed, or humored, by it at all. I didn't even read it until a moment ago. Still I am not impressed. However that is the way the world thinks. We are not alone in our feelings but we are so out numbered. I hold out on God and lean only on Him, or at least I try daily to do so.

I have come to a place in my life where I have accepted that I am different then most in regards to my faith. I also know that the Bible says wide is the road that leads to destruction. Seeing as to how I, we as Christians, are different in our faith and most are on the wide road why do we expect those around us to not act, talk and think unGodly?

I have come to a place in my life that I have realized that there is nothing, but prayer, that I can do to change others thoughts and feelings or actions. All I can do is live my life to the best I can that glorifies our Lord and Saviour. After all, that is what we are called to do, to bring Him glory....

A light cannot shine bright in a well lit room however, as we all know a candle sheds a bright light in a darkened room. We are the candles ladies, let's shine as bright as we can! My advice is to just don't let it bother you so much, stand firm for Christ and He will uplift you!

(Just fyi: my hubby said - after I read him the poster and your message - that what do we expect from an unsaved world? Even the Bible says a dog will go back to their vomit and pigs go back to the mire... He also said that what bothered him that Christians are not "allowed" to whip out their faith in public but those that are fanatics about sports can wear the team's colors, logos, jerseys etc... and expect others to be ok with it.)

Christians always get the raw end of the deal as we are truly the only light on Earth that shines for Christ. ust a sun hurts your eyes when you wake up to it shining in your face, so does our light to hurt those that are the unsaved.) Mike also says (I gotta love my hubby as he sure has a way with words!!!) that we are the salt of the Earth. Salt is a great preservative and adds wonderful flavor to foods but when you get salt in a cut it hurts like the dickens!!! You can't deny that salt can be painful to open wounds.... just as our faith can hurt and convict those that are unsaved.f the salt didn't hurt then is it really salt? If we are not standing out because of our faith how strong is our faith then? It should stand out and be strong.... We should be different then the unsaved.... It is what we are called to be. :o)

Where does one go when they need to keep a meat well preserved for later? People ask for salt. Where does one go, saved or not, when they need uplifting or prayer? They come to us, God's salt of the Earth.

Love ya Holly!!!!! Love ya Karen!!!! You two are actually my favorite facebook friends as I can always be uplifted up by your posts. :o)

Sorry this is so long! lol

Anti-Bullying

Many of you know that a 14 year old boy by the name of Jamey recently killed himself. He was bi. He was tormented online by other teens and at school by classmates.This link below is the news story about Jamey's passing. Please feel free to read it.

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/jamey-rodemeyer-suicide-ny-police-open-criminal-investigation/story?id=14580832

I'm in no way, shape or form stating I agree with Jamey's sexual orientation, I don't. No matter what his sexual preference was he did not have to die. In my opinion, this could have easily been prevented.

Many of you already know that my son Adam w severely bullied in public school, partly for being gay (WHICH HE IS NOT) and for being autistic (high functioning). As a result of this bullying we removed our child from the high school he was attending (9th grade) and are now finishing his education at home. He will not be going back to a school institution if I have any say about it, which I do. Mike and I have EVERY say about it. We have also chosen to continue our younger son's education at home also. This is partly due to his medical conditions and mostly due to how he was treated in public school also. (Daniel was out sick a lot in 6th grade because he was always throwing up on the way to, in and after arriving home, due to anxieties. As a result, unbeknownst to him he was being ridiculed and mocked behind his back when he was out sick. When Daniel entered 7th grade his stomach issue got much worse.) Sending any child to a place that is not condusice (physically or mentally) to uplift and support their well-being is not an option to me.

Public schools toot their horns of self-righteousness by using these anti-bullying posters, quotes and programs that they use. However, actions always speak louder then words. A picture of word a 1000 words. Anti-bullying quotes and posters do not stop anyone (adults or kids) fom bullying. Punishment does!

I'm not in agreement with Jamey's sexual preferences but that doesn't mean I would not have liked him if I personally met him. From listening to his youtube videos and reading the stories about him online I'm sure he was a sweet pleasant kid to be around. He should not have been bullied. I am not saying that people needed to (or should) condone his bi-sexual status or even act like they like it, but that being said they did not need to mock him and taunt him to kill himself either.

Please, keep in your prayers these kids that are being teased, mocked, harassed and bullied. Of course ray for salvation but also pray for strength from above to rise above their tormentors. Please please pray for those that bully others. This needs to stop and it needs to stop now!

Thank you.

so many things to blog about tonight. Part 2 :o)

ok, I was thinking on joining these two post tonight but thought better of it. It is nice to have the first one only about those that lost their lives on that dreadful day 10 years ago.

The things that have been going through my mind lately, that I want to blog about, are....

Fall. Summer is coming to a quick close and fall is nipping at our heels. How does this make you feel? It makes me feel sad and happy. Sad because 11 years ago I lost my father in law to cancer and my mother to many physical illnesses that she could no longer fight. I miss them both a lot. some days more then others. If you have lost a loved one you know how I feel. Fall reminds me that they are no longer here to spend the holidays with, to see my boys become teens, get a job, get married and such. They are no longer here to call or joke with or to be upset at. I cannot know for certain where another's heart is but I feel that they both got saved before death took them. That brings some peace and comfort. Only some...

That year we also lost Mike's grandmother 1-1-2000. Mike's dad on November 17, 2000, My mom December 13, 2000. It sure was a hard year for us. But through it all God has given us strength and comfort and power to overcome the sadness and loss. for that I am thankful!!!

Fall is also a time that brings to light that cold is on it's way. I hate being cold!!!! I mean I really REALLY hate the cold. It's not the snow that bugs me, nor the icky driving conditions. I can deal with all of tat. I just hate the cold itself. lol The days get shorter and the sun shines less brightly which makes the days seem gloomier. It is during those times that I rejoice in my quiet time with God.

Ok, so now what to talk about? hhhmmm.... hives! yup, hives, those red welts that spring up out of no where that itch and itch and itch. They make your skin look like it is sunburned in patches. Now, I personally have never had hives. THANKFULLY!!! Daniel did. Actually he had them for the first time about a week ago. It was so sudden and so bad that we took him to urgent care. Although the prednisone and allergy meds have kicked the hives butt we still have no idea what caused them. Daniel seems to have recently developed allergies. We know that Soy bothers him, now this. hhhmmmm. It makes me wonder why. As long as I figure out what he was allergic to I don't care why. I just don't want him to get hives again. lol

What else??? ADAM! Yes, Adam, my 16 year old son. Adam is an amazing kid, but I am little biased, just a little. lol Adam is coming into his own, as one might say. He is finding his own niche in life and becoming more (dare I say it?) responsible. I never thought I would say that about Adam. Adam has Asperger's Syndrome and at times can be very irresponsible and immature. Not so lately though. Adam has had a rough couple of years and has been introduced to some awful temptations. He has struggled, and still continue to struggle, with one particular temptation. He knows that it is wrong but as with any sin we might (and usually will) encounter it is very very tempting. We heard a teaching years ago that was about avoiding sin. Adam seems to have taken this to heart. His actions speak louder then any words ever could! The teaching basically said that when you see temptation coming your way you cross the street and avoid it as much as you can. (Ex. a gambler might have someone in charge of his money for a while so that he doesn't gamble it all away. Or a womanizer might avoid places that he would be primarily around women. a person with internet addictions would just get rid of (or pack away for a while) the computer.) You see, these examples all have one thing in common; they took steps to make sure they were help accountable for their actions and they found ways to prevent temptations. Adam has done that!!! On his own he has asked for help and suggested ways he can be held more accountable. He is taking action to avoid the temptation so he doesn't fall into sin.

Wait, did I say that right? Yes I did. The temptation is not the problem. Everyone will be tempted more times they they can count during their lifetime, some of us many more times than that! It is when we follow the temptations that is the problem. That is when we fall into sin. sin is an ugly thing covered in sweet decadence. It is enjoyable so we think well, this couldn't be so bad. I can do this just this once. No one will know. But God knows. You ever hear the saying don't feed a stray cat or you'll never get rid of it? Well, that is they way sin is. Once you fall into it doing it again is only easier. It is hard to stop once you gone that way before.

So I want to publicly say that I am very proud of my son asking God for help and asking those around him to also help him. He is showing restraint and spiritual growth. I am impressed and in awe of his actions.

I had other things on my mind but now they seem to have escaped me. I will say good night then and remind you to pray for the families that lost loved ones on that dreadful day 10 years ago.
God Bless.

so many things to blog about tonight. but one is most important :o)

First and foremost I see what the date it. It is 9-11-2011.
10 years ago in about 8 hours I was woken up by a phone call. My sister from AZ called me practically in hysterics telling me to turn on my TV. As I was still sleeping when she called, I was still groggy. Turning on the tv shocked me. It was devastating to say the least.

Now thinking about it it truly is more devastating then we actually think. I suspect a large number of those people were unsaved. Now they never have the opportunity to get saved again. They are in eternity suffering. It truly breaks my heart.....

I know some people say to pray for the souls that are lost, but I ask what does that actually do? The people are dead. Praying isn't going to help them anymore. I ask you to pray for the families of those that died that tragic day. Those families might either pull towards God looking for hope or hate God for letting it happen. Either way, salvation for them is paramount.

I say a somber prayer for those that mourn.

life lessons: so many blessings

hi. When I thought to write this blog today I wasn't sure what I wanted to write about, just that I really wanted to write. :o) That is usually the way my brain works. lol It's great on the spur of the moment.

Ok, so as I sit here I am reminded of how blessed we are. Yes, I mean my family but I also mean each one of us, including you, the reader. We take so much for granted that we don't even see all the wonderful things we have. Now, I'm an optimistic person by nature, or so I think I am. I like to think of what I have rather then what I do not have. Maybe that is from my childhood. I grew up dirt poor, I mean REALLY dirt poor until I was 7 years old. I then moved into a foster home in a upper-middle class neighborhood with what felt like wealthy people to care for me. This is where I was raised for the next 14 years and blessed with everything I needed to live comfortably. Then I grew up and I moved out. I moved into a small studio apartment with my new husband, Mike. Then we moved to a small (tiny) 2 bedroom that was literally falling apart and drafty as all get out. Finally we moved here, where we live now. We live in a comfortably sized 2 bedroom apartment in a nice small town. We have lived here for 14 years now. We love it here.

Over the course of my life I have been on both sides of the spectrum a couple of times, back and forth. Poor, well off, poor, well off.... back and forth... Now, even though Mike and I are not financially well off we are very content with what God has blessed us with.

We do not have cable, high speed internet nor call waiting and voice mail. We eat simple meals rather then steaks and chops or lobster and crabs. Mac & cheese, hamburger helper, hot dogs, and chicken are all staples in this house. These foods tend to fit in our price range and fill us up enough so that we are not going through tons of food. (They are also foods which we enjoy eating, sometimes a bit too much!) I don't have an expensive coat, purse or pair of shoes. I shop at Wal-Mart and Aldi's frequently. This saves money. We try to watch our budget and plan for upcoming events, such as doctor visits. When we get our tax return we set it aside, broken up into different categories for things, such as clothes, that we will need in the coming year. We very rarely go to the theaters for movies and we do not buy a lot of dvds but rather borrow them from the library or friends. We have only one car that gets Mike to and from work. I use it only when I need to to save gas $. So you see, we really have to careful we do not over spend. We pray before we do our budget, we do the budget together and we try to be good stewards with what God has bestowed upon us.

Where am I going with this? Well, I am showing you that even though life seems wonderful from the world's view, things aren't always wheat they seem. We are not rich and we do struggle in more then one way in our marriage and life in general. It's during these rough times that our true character shows. Where to we go to when we need help, guidance, comfort? When things are going well who do we thanks? When we feel blessed who do we give credit to? All these things are vitally important in being content.

When you wake up in the morning who do you thank for the breath you take? Can you put your feet on the floor and stand up? Can you comb your own hair? Can you read the cereal box as you eat your breakfast with your own two hands? Do you have fmaily or friends that call you or talk to you frequently? Whom do you thank for those friendships?

Bottom line: who is in control of your life? God? or yourself? Do you think that you have made all the things in your life possible? Are you blessed by your own hard work? or did God bless you? He gave you the air to breath and lungs to filter the CO2 out and O2 in. He gave you those hands to lift the spoon to your mouth and the phone to your ear. He gave you those feet to put into those nice shoes he provided the money for you to buy.

Everyday we take things for granted. We assume, expect, that there will be food in the cupboards, money to pay the bills, clothes to keep us warm. What if you woke up one day and found that you had nothing? I mean nothing... no house, no bed, no clothes, no food and worst of all no money to get any of those things? Would you still be happy? Would you still thank God for the air you breath? The ground you walk on and that ability to walk on that very same ground?

I would like to think I would seeing as how I have seen the good and the bad of being 'rich' and poor.... I'm not sure that I would be so thankful though. Once you live comfortably in a nice area you tend to get used to it and expect it to always just get better. But it doesn't always, does it?

All this is on my mind today as a result of a couple of things. One, our pastor's teachings lately have been on following God and living for Him, and what happens when you don't. I am also thinking of a Liberian family that left their homeland with nothing. the mother died not that long after coming to America and the father was blinded because of his faith in Christ our Lord. Refugees.... that is really what they are. They still have fmaily in Liberia. Their family has had many of the men killed in the civil wars, leaving many of the women and children husbandless and fatherless. Seeing how woman are generally thought of as lower class in many of these poor countries (I'm not sure about Liberia, this is my assumption) these poor women have to try to survive and take care of themselves and their children. These poor women are burdened with all the responsibilities of both parents in raising their children in a country that doesn't have much and the poor have the least of all. My thoughts run wild wiht questions like are the kids going to bed hungry? Do they have clothes that fit them? are thy going to school? Do they have the supplies they need to have a proper education?

Chance are these questions are answered most of the time wiht a no, they do not.... But here we sit, in front of our few hundred dollar computers, with our cell phones sitting on the desk next to us and a nice afternoon snack or yummy foods and a comforting beverage. In the other room we actually have a bed with a few blankets and a pillow instead of a blanket on the cold hard ground. We hear the television mumbling in the background instead of the moans of our hungry children....

This is a lot longer then I had planned. I do feel that we as Americans really need to stop and thank God for all that we are blessed wiht. It is not by our might, nor our power but by the power of the Almighty that has blessed us with such great things that surround us every minute of everyday. We need to stop moaning about not haviung the latest and greatest game system, ringtone, sneakers and hair styles. We NEED to start thanking God for our blessings. I hope you agree....

Next time you wish you had something you can't afford remember those children who have to search the garbage dumps for cardboard to sell just so they can eat something that day.... Be thankful to God for all your blessings. :o)