life lessons: so many blessings

hi. When I thought to write this blog today I wasn't sure what I wanted to write about, just that I really wanted to write. :o) That is usually the way my brain works. lol It's great on the spur of the moment.

Ok, so as I sit here I am reminded of how blessed we are. Yes, I mean my family but I also mean each one of us, including you, the reader. We take so much for granted that we don't even see all the wonderful things we have. Now, I'm an optimistic person by nature, or so I think I am. I like to think of what I have rather then what I do not have. Maybe that is from my childhood. I grew up dirt poor, I mean REALLY dirt poor until I was 7 years old. I then moved into a foster home in a upper-middle class neighborhood with what felt like wealthy people to care for me. This is where I was raised for the next 14 years and blessed with everything I needed to live comfortably. Then I grew up and I moved out. I moved into a small studio apartment with my new husband, Mike. Then we moved to a small (tiny) 2 bedroom that was literally falling apart and drafty as all get out. Finally we moved here, where we live now. We live in a comfortably sized 2 bedroom apartment in a nice small town. We have lived here for 14 years now. We love it here.

Over the course of my life I have been on both sides of the spectrum a couple of times, back and forth. Poor, well off, poor, well off.... back and forth... Now, even though Mike and I are not financially well off we are very content with what God has blessed us with.

We do not have cable, high speed internet nor call waiting and voice mail. We eat simple meals rather then steaks and chops or lobster and crabs. Mac & cheese, hamburger helper, hot dogs, and chicken are all staples in this house. These foods tend to fit in our price range and fill us up enough so that we are not going through tons of food. (They are also foods which we enjoy eating, sometimes a bit too much!) I don't have an expensive coat, purse or pair of shoes. I shop at Wal-Mart and Aldi's frequently. This saves money. We try to watch our budget and plan for upcoming events, such as doctor visits. When we get our tax return we set it aside, broken up into different categories for things, such as clothes, that we will need in the coming year. We very rarely go to the theaters for movies and we do not buy a lot of dvds but rather borrow them from the library or friends. We have only one car that gets Mike to and from work. I use it only when I need to to save gas $. So you see, we really have to careful we do not over spend. We pray before we do our budget, we do the budget together and we try to be good stewards with what God has bestowed upon us.

Where am I going with this? Well, I am showing you that even though life seems wonderful from the world's view, things aren't always wheat they seem. We are not rich and we do struggle in more then one way in our marriage and life in general. It's during these rough times that our true character shows. Where to we go to when we need help, guidance, comfort? When things are going well who do we thanks? When we feel blessed who do we give credit to? All these things are vitally important in being content.

When you wake up in the morning who do you thank for the breath you take? Can you put your feet on the floor and stand up? Can you comb your own hair? Can you read the cereal box as you eat your breakfast with your own two hands? Do you have fmaily or friends that call you or talk to you frequently? Whom do you thank for those friendships?

Bottom line: who is in control of your life? God? or yourself? Do you think that you have made all the things in your life possible? Are you blessed by your own hard work? or did God bless you? He gave you the air to breath and lungs to filter the CO2 out and O2 in. He gave you those hands to lift the spoon to your mouth and the phone to your ear. He gave you those feet to put into those nice shoes he provided the money for you to buy.

Everyday we take things for granted. We assume, expect, that there will be food in the cupboards, money to pay the bills, clothes to keep us warm. What if you woke up one day and found that you had nothing? I mean nothing... no house, no bed, no clothes, no food and worst of all no money to get any of those things? Would you still be happy? Would you still thank God for the air you breath? The ground you walk on and that ability to walk on that very same ground?

I would like to think I would seeing as how I have seen the good and the bad of being 'rich' and poor.... I'm not sure that I would be so thankful though. Once you live comfortably in a nice area you tend to get used to it and expect it to always just get better. But it doesn't always, does it?

All this is on my mind today as a result of a couple of things. One, our pastor's teachings lately have been on following God and living for Him, and what happens when you don't. I am also thinking of a Liberian family that left their homeland with nothing. the mother died not that long after coming to America and the father was blinded because of his faith in Christ our Lord. Refugees.... that is really what they are. They still have fmaily in Liberia. Their family has had many of the men killed in the civil wars, leaving many of the women and children husbandless and fatherless. Seeing how woman are generally thought of as lower class in many of these poor countries (I'm not sure about Liberia, this is my assumption) these poor women have to try to survive and take care of themselves and their children. These poor women are burdened with all the responsibilities of both parents in raising their children in a country that doesn't have much and the poor have the least of all. My thoughts run wild wiht questions like are the kids going to bed hungry? Do they have clothes that fit them? are thy going to school? Do they have the supplies they need to have a proper education?

Chance are these questions are answered most of the time wiht a no, they do not.... But here we sit, in front of our few hundred dollar computers, with our cell phones sitting on the desk next to us and a nice afternoon snack or yummy foods and a comforting beverage. In the other room we actually have a bed with a few blankets and a pillow instead of a blanket on the cold hard ground. We hear the television mumbling in the background instead of the moans of our hungry children....

This is a lot longer then I had planned. I do feel that we as Americans really need to stop and thank God for all that we are blessed wiht. It is not by our might, nor our power but by the power of the Almighty that has blessed us with such great things that surround us every minute of everyday. We need to stop moaning about not haviung the latest and greatest game system, ringtone, sneakers and hair styles. We NEED to start thanking God for our blessings. I hope you agree....

Next time you wish you had something you can't afford remember those children who have to search the garbage dumps for cardboard to sell just so they can eat something that day.... Be thankful to God for all your blessings. :o)

Wow! Still learning

Ok, so I am 38 years old. I will be 39 in November. This goes to prove you really never stop learning. If we stopped learning that would say that we know everything. Then we would be God. We are SOOOOO NOT God! Therefore we do not know everything. Therefore there is always room to learn. :o)

Ok, so what did  learn? I learned that you can't please people who obviously do not want to be pleased by you. I also learned that in order to have your heart right with God you have to be willing to put things behind you. If you are always looking behind you thinking of what u was then you can't very well watch what is in front of you. You miss out on tremendous blessings that way!

Today was rough. I was trying so hard to get things scanned, emailed, printed and snail mailed out today. My printer/scanner wasn't working as fast as I wanted it too. The documents were too large to email so I had to adapt them. Then I screwed up the address on the envelope and had to rewrite it.
After that was all completed I found out that someone I know fell into some serious temptation. They felt horribly guilty and needed some comfort and wisdom. Another friend come over in tears. I felt so bad for her. Teens are difficult to raise as it is, but her struggles today were like hitting a brick wall. (((hugs))) (you know who you are. luv ya!!!) After all that we finally were able to put our house back in order and get somethings cleaned up before heading out to McD's on our way to Worship Jam at church. I expected the worship jam to go smoothly and for me to end up feeling blessed as I always do there. Apparently that was too much to expect. lol Boy does our flesh get us into trouble!!!!

At Worship Jam I was blindsided by another parent regarding something very petty in my eyes. I was hurt and let those emotions get the best of me. When I gt hurt I get angry at who hurt me, especially if this person has done this before to me. This person has hurt me in the past and they certainly know they have so my anger was getting high. I let it get like that. I felt justified. I felt I had every right to let the world know this person was self-centered.

I asked to speak to a terrific sister in the Lord about the situation. If anyone could help refocus me on Christ it was this woman. She has an amazing way of seeing the world and helping others see it through God's eyes too. So I calmed down and enjoyed the songs. When we had a snack break during the worship jam someone said something to me, in a very playful way, that was a reminder of the whole situation I had just, or thought I had, gotten past. Well, you know your heart holds onto things a lot longer then it should because I was not over the situation. The hurt and the frustration all came back. It made me cry, more out of my inability to stop feeling so hurt then out of the situation itself. I  HAD to give it to Christ and leave it in His more then capable hands. That is much easier said then done though.

So now here I sit. I am thinking of the whole situation in a new light. In the light that my dear friend tried to show me when I was crying and fuming at church earlier. God's hands are stronger, larger, more gently, more protective then mine ever could be. I think he can take care of a few hurt feelings since He IS the one that created the universe with only a few small words.

After al this I see what a fool I was to let this person get under my skin. I see what a fool I was not trusting God to hold me close and love me despite what this other person thought. I see how God's loving hands are always there to help us through the struggles. I just need to start seeing myself leaning on those same loving and attentive hands.