what a day. :)

So, today I woke up feeling fairly good for a change. So many things have gone on in my life recently that I feel as though I barely have anytime to breathe. :) Although this week did not go as I had planned, or at least had hoped it would go, I am here to tell you all about it now. This week consisted of a migraine, a trip to the docs for me to get rid of my migraine, some school (although not nearly as much as I had hoped), lots of phone calls (way too many!), cleaning house, laundry, going through curriculum books, organizing the school bookcase, a major (MAJOR) fight with Adam, friends visiting (love ya Jennie!!), Adam's doctor appointment, Wal-Mart a couple of times, library a couple of times, baby sitting, blood work, and finally a cranky teenage boy in pain with a kidney infection. I think that about sums up my week. Oh! Did I mention Adam's bike got stolen? lol Oh MY! What a week we have had here!

So what did I get out of this week? Make the most of what I am given each day, despite how I felt physically. I was able to breathe. I was able to walk. I was able to cook a wide variety of foods to satisfy my family. I had clothes (too many Mike would say!) to keep me warm. A roof over my head that keeps me dry when it rains and in the shade when the sun shines. Medicine to make me feel better and a family to love me.

All in all, I think it was a pretty good week.

I know each of us has our bad days, some more then others. I also know some of us aren't as lucky (actually blessed) as others to have all the things that we have. But, I also know that if you are reading this you are alive and that is something to be thankful for!

You know, you might look at my life and think what does she have to be unhappy for? She's happily married, has a nice place to live, goes to church and has great friends. How could she relate to the life I have? Well, there is so much you do not know about me and tonight I feel led to share.

When I was a wee babe I lived with my biological mom and dad and 5 siblings. We lived in a run down house that we rented, in a crime ridden, cockroach infested part of the city. I was beaten so bad that I should have died. I have had all the bones in my body broken at least once, including my neck. Actually we all were, all six of us kids. When I was 7 my whole world fell apart.

My father and mother had signed all of their kids over to the State of NY. They didn't want us anymore, or so it felt at the time. All 6 of us kids were placed in foster homes. God blessed me with two wonderful things that year. One, that I was one of only two of the 6 kids to live with a sibling. The other one was my older sister, Loana. We lived, for the next 14 years, with our foster parents. They were amazing parents. I never went hungry anymore, I always had fresh clean clothes that actually fit me and were not hand me downs with tons of stains and holes, I went to a nice school where I did not get ridiculed each day, I was no longer beaten daily, and most of all I learned that Jesus died to save my soul.

When I turned 21 I married the most wonderful man I had ever met. Our life started out great, so I thought. I had a horrible pregnancy with my oldest son right after we got married. I had always had muscle and joint pains but now they were getting much, much worse. I couldn't take care of my family like I needed to because of the pain and the post-postpartum depression. I started my marriage thinking life would be glorious once I got married. Boy, was I wrong! Having all these new responsibilities, having a new baby and being in more pain then before all the time was a bit too much for me. My new husband had no idea what he had got himself into either! He thought he was marrying someone that was healthy only to find out she (me) had one medical problem after another.I found out I had Fibromyalgia and Endometriosis. I have had a complete hysterectomy and two foot surgeries. I am on meds for the rest of my life for health issues and pain. We had unresolved issues for a long time. After while we started to talk about the issues and, with God's guidance, we were able to work things out.

As the years have gone on we have not only grown closer to each other but, more importantly, grown closer to God. It takes each day waking up and putting God first in your life, in your marriage, in your parenting to stay close to Him and have a happy marriage. Parenting isn't all it's cracked up to be either! I thought when I had kids things would be ok. We would live the normal "2.5 kids, a house and a dog" lifestyle that is so common in the US. After that first rough pregnancy and delivery Mike wanted no mare kids. Adam was a handful too, so having kids right away wasn't really an option for either one of us. Then after a bit we changed our minds (and God creates in woman the ability to forget what having a baby is really like!) and we had Daniel. Now I thought Adam was a handful. I had no idea what having Daniel would be like.

Both my kids have special needs that each have their own challenges. Adam has severe learning disabilities with reading and writing, Asperger's, Sensory Processing issues, and hypermobility. Daniel has Moebius, Sensory Processing Issues and Anxieties. Daniel was also born with a malformed kidney that needed to be removed when he was 10 months old. Between both kids we have seen a ton of doctor's and read a ton of books. We have talked to other parents that have kids like ours and gleamed a lot of useful information. But no matter what help you get, having special needs children requires a lot of time and effort. Now we are homeschooling both boys again after having 3 - 4 years off (they were in public school).

So you see, life isn't all peachy keen and a bed of roses. Life is hard, for everyone. I know life can give you lemons and you should make lemonade with them. Easier said then done! lol With God though, things sort of fall in to place and He provides help and comfort from the oddest places.

I know life can be rough. Alright, it can be down right crappy at times! But God is there through it all. He is waiting for you to take His hand and let Him lead you. I guess that is why, after such a horrible week, I am thrilled to have experienced it. God has been great to me this week. I still have my health (even if that has problems too), my wonderful family, a great place to live, clothes on my back, food to eat, and a car to drive. I could go on and on and on with the blessings God gives me each day but I think you get the point.

So, think about what God has given you the next time you think life is rough. Think of those that are less fortunate then you. Remember that God loves you so much that He doesn't want you to suffer. All He asks in return is for you to love Him back and follow His lead. I hope you do that. I know I will!